Thick Neck Thursday: @ChicagoBears Edition

I'm a Chicagoan and I rep for the home team, which means this week's Thick Neck Thursday is all about the Chicago Bears!

I'd love to feature one of the actual players, but let's be honest - - there's nothing better than a Thick Neck that knows the art of shutting up. Therefore, I'm beyond ecstatic to introduce the world to Bear Down - - the inflatable Thick Neck I'm dropping it for in the this photo ---->

Bear Down, or 'Bear' as I like to call him, is pretty fucking amazeballs! He's like SUPER duper thick @ 300+ lbs, built like a cross between a Gorilla and a Spartan Warrior God, and has a knack for dressing up. He tends to keep his uniform on a lot, but that's just to show off his thickness. He's on the quiet side, but I prefer to not have him open up his mouth and ruin the moment.

What else? He's pretty much obsessed with my entire life force which works for me. I mean, what girl doesn't want a Thick Neck obsessing over her existence? Come on now... Duh! Also, he has a nice smile so I'm not complaining about that either.

The Bears have a game tonight and are currently 1-0, so let's keep the team spirit going!!! On another note, where are your favorite places to watch the Chicago games? I'm on the hunt for a cool spot in the city (preferably the South Loop).

GO Bears!

#NoFilter #NoMakeup Rant

I'm wondering who started this whole #NoFilter #NoMakeup trend... especially when you see tons of people taking pictures where they clearly have used a filter and are wearing makeup lol. Seriously. I'm usually not an internet troll (well, I only troll the life force of @throttle_nerd lol), but I was on instagram last night and super irked by the number of people using the hashtags and clearly faking the funk.

A while back (winter 2010) I was equally irked by women on YouTube that would make videos, but profusely apologize for their appearance, or lack of makeup, hair being done, etc... It was just super fucking annoying especially when most of these chicks had nothing wrong with them. I ended up filming a mini rant/inspirational video that people should stop making apologies for the way they were sans the extra stuff. So, ultimately I guess this video could be called a #NoFilter #TakeOffYourMakeup thing lol.

This will make your day...

An "Epic" Weekend (@PoshLifeEvents)

When I awoke this weekend to a crisp 58 degrees outside, I knew the Fall chill was starting to hit Chicago. I secretly  rejoiced that I could turn off my A/C and say goodbye to shrunken hair, but knew I better cling on to the last few days of heat we'd be experiencing in the city.

Cheers to the end of summer

As a way to formally bid adieu to "Summertime Chi," I attended the Posh Entertainment end of summer day party at Epic. DJ's Jay Illa and Marcus Shadden delighted our ears with two sets, while Epic kept the overpriced drinks flowing. I don't typically cringe at drink prices, but averaging $13-$16 for a cocktail? That shit cray. Don't get me wrong, I still paid for it lol... but I wasn't paying for the liquor as much as I was the River North address.

On the bright side, the bartenders were extremely friendly, the venue has a gorgeous interior and rooftop and none of the staff were actual douchebags.

This was my first time attending a  Posh Entertainment event and I had no clue what to expect. I'd sum it up to say they attract a nice urban crowd. Picture the cool kids in college that went on to become actual working professionals with legit business cards. I actually think they had one of the better urban crowds in Chicago, but there was a downside.

DJ Jay Illa & DJ Marcus Shadden

I'm sure everyone there was awesome, but the issue was that they all believed their own hype. The majority of people stood around with an heir of "I'm very important. Look at how awesome my aura is" while not dancing or managing to look like they were having fun. It was a lot of drinking, smiling, and polite mingling... but this was an end of summer roof top party.

It reminded me of the people that were Greek in college and spent their time stepping and strolling at parties... but were at the point that they could no longer do that at events so they were left pondering how to have a good time. They still felt important and like they were a big deal, but how do you distinct yourself from the crowd. The answer? Stand around holding your cocktails listening to bomb music not dancing. Crack a slight smile every now and then and kiss your friends on the cheek.

We drink, smile AND dance

At other times is felt like a grade school dance with men standing on one side and women on the other. Nobody seemed to really let loose and have a ball. If the event wasn't on a rooftop with fresh air I don't know if I could've stomached the stuffiness and pretentious crowd. The DJs were awesome and the drinks were on point. The crowd had zero ratchet so why was nobody getting it in?

I didn't ponder this for too long because my girlfriends and I always have a ball, so we danced, drank and were merry. Even after the event ended we kept the party going.

Overall, I had a great time and would definitely attend another Posh Entertainment event, but would love to see more fun and less pretentiousness.

@TheRock: Thick Does a Body Great

Oh, Mr. Johnson...

Let me count the ways your traps, neck and tattoo mesmerize me. I want to write a sonnet and sing praises of your body... but it's 2012 so a blog post with have to suffice lol.

I was watching Fast Five the other night and sat in awe of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's thickness.

At 260 lbs, Johnson is one of my favorite Hollywood Thick Necks stacked into a staggering 6'5" package. And guess what? He's part of the 40 yo club. Yes, Johnson is successful, thick, and grown! I'm currently fanning myself down lol. Add his drool worthy Polynesian half sleeve tattoo into the mix and ooh weee! I need a few moments to myself.

I think he did a great job making the transition from pro wrestler to Hollywood actor, and when he shaved his head a few years ago I wanted to give him a round of applause.

I'm actually a fan of a bald head and don't understand men that refuse to let go of their fledgling hair hopes and dreams. Just shave the shit already. Damn lol.

See this photo.

This is my fantasy. Period.

<----- This one

You know how people ask you what your fantasy is? I don't have any desire to dress up as a school girl and get called into the principal's office. I don't want to play good cop/bad cop. I don't even want to do some super voyeuristic stuff. My fantasy is having THAT RIGHT THERE kick in my apartment door in that EXACT outfit... and then proceed to question me... by any means necessary...because I promise you whatever it is, I did it... and I'm in trouble. A lot of trouble. TMI? lol...

But seriously. How could anyone not in their right mind look at that man and not get female wood. (Does that exist?) He's like everything I've ever imagined in my Thick Neck Dreams. If only I could combine him and Jared Odrick to make my superhuman Thick Bot.

@HennessyUS "The Chase" hits Chicago

Last week I had the opportunity to attend Hennessy's "The Chase" event held in the West Loop @ Venue One. The line was thick, but after an hour wait I made it inside and was treated to a slice of the #WildRabbit life. Let's just say that Hennessy knows how to throw a party.

The brand has a reputation in the urban market for being the drink of choice for men, usually on the rocks... but they did an amazing job highlighting their new cocktails.

My favorite of the night was the Music Icon: Level 1. This cocktail was insanely tasty and featured ingredients you'd have around the house... basically it's super easy to prepare.

In a rocks glass combined with ice:

1.5 oz Henness VS

.5 oz Lime Juice

.5 oz Lemon Juice

1 oz Simple Syrup

Garnish with lemon or lime wedge. Ta-da. That's it...and you'll have a deliciousness in a glass.

For upcoming events check out their site. It's free and a ton of fun!

I had no clue I was standing in front of this, but SO on point for where I am in life