Sep 26, 2014

How long is "too long" to be engaged?

During an interview on the Wendy Show, Jennifer Hudson was asked about her 5+ year engagement to fiance David Otunga and her response was that they were "taking baby steps."

When I heard this my face screwed up just as quickly as Wendy's did lol. I was like, wait a minute. Baby steps? What world are you living in where having a 5 year old son and being engaged for 6 years equates to baby steps? I mean, if a baby and 6 year relationship are baby steps, what are we all doing with our lives?

I've never quite understood people who feel comfortable accepting a marriage proposal, but drag their feet with the whole marriage thing. I mean, the point of an engagement is to actually get married. Now, I am sure that long engagements have probably equaled more than a few dodged bullets, but the reality of the situation (in my perspective) is that you shouldn't feel comfortable accepting a marriage proposal from someone you wouldn't want to spend the rest of your life with.

JHud, Fiance Otunga and Son David Jr.
In my own experience I was engaged for about a day or two tops, then we got married - - because that's what people do. They get engaged and then get married lol. Now, it's no secret that a few years later and I was divorced, but the length of the engagement or quickness of the actual wedding didn't affect that. I've been rather transparent about the struggle that is military life... but I digress. I can really only rationalize about 1-2 years for an engagement and that would be to save money, plan the wedding, seek out pre-marital counseling... you know, actual stuff that you should be doing with the time you're engaged.

After being engaged for over 5 years, it feels as though the engagement is more of a novelty and "get out of jail free card" from having to call yourself a baby mama or baby daddy. Do you think it's normal to have a 5+ year engagement? Or does this seem like some fuckery and foolishness?

Thoughts?



http://youtu.be/aiXB0xMBZZ4


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