Jan 25, 2015

R&B Singer Mya Takes Main Stage at Strip Club. Folks Are Mad.

R&B singer Mya made waves this weekend when she performed at G5ive Lounge, a strip club in Miami. So, why does everyone seem to have found spare fucks to give the old, R&B diva? Well, a snippet of her "performance" (which I'm using the term loosely), featured Mya dropping, grinding, popping, twirling... basically just working the stage and it made me cringe.

Yes, Mya is 35, still looks gorgeous, and is doing what she needs to do to make coins. I mean, if folks are still paying to see her perform does the location matter! Absolutely.

I wanted to watch her performance without judgment and just see an entertainer still excited to perform... however, I felt like she was cheapening herself. I cringed as she rolled around on stage, tossing her hair, while another naked dancer held the pole next to her.

Having your career reduced to strip club performances is one thing, but Mya was basically playing the equivalent of "3 pumps" with the pole. She simply needed a wardrobe malfunction or gust of wind to give the strippers some real competition.

I asked myself if Rihanna had done the same thing would anyone care? Would anyone judge? Hmmm... probably not. Rihanna has made a career of shenanigans and fuckery and for some reason I just expected a bit more from Mya. She always had a regal heir to her... but I guess that got left in the late 90s/early 2000s. #KanyeShrug

A video posted by DESTINED FOR GREATNESS (@flylifestyl3) on

Jan 20, 2015

The Art of Doing Nothing

When is the last time you did nothing? Like truly spent an entire weekend basking in the beauty of having no real plans? This past weekend I took the opportunity to become one with my head wrap (i.e. not do my hair), cuddle up with my dog, and chill the fuck out. I luxuriated in the joy of multiple daytime naps, tacos and pizza, took entirely too many selfies, cheered on the Seahawks, ate a bag of cookies, even more naps! It was a thing of beauty.

I  should note that I did get in 2 great workouts because even though I was on chill mode, my workout schedule has become a part of my life rain or shine (peep the calories burned in my pics), but even working up a sweat was followed by a smoothie and chill session.

I'm a busy body and usually loathe standing still. My BF often asks me why I can never "just be" and it's something I struggle with. I like to be moving around, talking, shaking, dancing... being busy. This long weekend allowed me the opportunity to press pause and not really do anything... and it was nice. The best part of my weekend was ending things ending grits, drinking wine and listening to classic Sade on vinyl. A great weekend indeed.

Jan 18, 2015

Awkward Black Girl @IssaRae coming to Seattle 2/12

I'm always excited to have events come to the city, especially those featuring successful and innovative black women.

On Thursday, February 12th, Issa Rae will take the stage at the OMA&D Ethnic Cultural Center to discuss her new book, "The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl" with a Q&A following after. Whether you're a fan of her work, excited about her book, or just want to meet her in person and maybe snag a picture, I'd suggest adding your name to the waitlist for what's sure to be a fun evening.

Jan 14, 2015

Nate Jackson's Super Funny Comedy Show in Tacoma, WA (@MrNateJackson)

Tommy Davidson
I have yet to blog about my experience attending the Joe Torry NYE comedy show in Seattle a few weeks ago... the show in which Joe Torry himself canceled mid show (yes, he canceled... mid show... for the 2nd show on New Years Eve! A major shit show). But, the positive that came out of that experience was the venue (Parlor Live Seattle) offering complimentary tickets to see Tommy Davidson perform the following week.

Last weekend I got to cash in on those free tickets and take a trip down memory lane. I hadn't kept up to date with Davidson since his 'In Living Color' days, but he took the stage and gave a funny show.

Nate Jackson
One of the highlights of the show was being introduced to Nate Jackson, a hilarious comedian and Seattle native, who opened  the show for Tommy Davidson. During the after show meet & greet, Nate told our group about the monthly comedy show he hosts in Tacoma.

I'm always on the hunt for cool things to do in Seattle, and Tacoma is only a 30-45 mins drive (depending on traffic) from Seattle. If the show is anything like Nate's performance I saw last weekend it'll be worth the drive.

In an effort to help keep everyone's social life thriving, especially transplants who move to Seattle and have no clue what is going on and where to go, I wanted to share this new gem with the blog.

Tickets are only $15 and can be purchased here.

Sidebar: There are 2 locations for Keys on Main - - one in Seattle and another in Tacoma. Please note that this event will be held at the Tacoma location

Jan 13, 2015

Go see Selma (@SelmaMovie)

This past weekend I went to see Selma and y'all... it was definitely a must-see film. This movie reached deep down and touched my soul, my inner desire for humanity and ... I mean, just taking time to process that this film was based on history... and not some history that happened a million years ago. There are people still alive who experienced this stuff first hand and it blows my mind.

We've come far, but have not really made much progress. I feel like racism in the US has just evolved. Hate and discrimination are still widespread. Human life is still not all valued the same. This group feels superior to this group... that group doesn't want to see this one thrive. We're all stranded on this island called Earth, fighting over limited resources, refusing to work together... running amok and acting like fools. Between the police brutality happening in the US, terror attacks in Paris and Nigeria, and just overall steady stream of bullshit the world continues to crank out on a daily basis, it's easy to feel discouraged.

I found Selma to be a touching film and perfectly timed. The cast was stellar and it was nice to see this snapshot of American history and MLK Jr.'s life. If you have yet to see it, I'd suggest checking local listings in your area and making a date of it. This is a heavy movie, so our group opted for a matinee showing. I'd definitely recommend seeing this in the daytime.

Jan 5, 2015

What I learned in 2014

I'm a firm believer in life being the best teacher, and I've found blogging to be a great way to look back on my life, actions, ups and downs... really take stock of my "voice" and see where I was at a particular time. Last January I decided to share "life lessons" with the intention of looking back come 2015 and seeing what I had learned. In short, seeing what I was in essence teaching myself. There was no posting schedule for these "lessons" as everything just came from the heart, whenever it felt right.

Looking over the list it feels extremely gratifying to know how much progress I've made. I'm already looking forward to sharing things for 2015!

Lesson 15: A back-up plan is if the first plan doesn't work

Lesson 14: Fear of flying

Lesson 13: We all have off days

Lesson 12: The grass isn't always greener

Lesson 11: Life is short... or is it?

Lesson 10: Every saint has a past

Lesson 9: There's always time for a workout

Lesson 8: God will give you more than you can handle

Lesson 7: Just do it

Lesson 6: What you allow is what will continue

Lesson 5: It's okay to save money

Lesson 4: God loves a cheerful giver

Lesson 3: Agree to disagree

Lesson 2: Don't pick your blemishes

Lesson 1: Everyone doesn't want your opinion

Jan 2, 2015

New year, new you?

At the risk of sounding a bit smug, there really is nothing special about January 1st. Yes, it marks the start of a new year, but in all honesty, you can make those changes December 1st or June 1st with the same potential for success. Nevertheless, a new year has begun and I'm excited to continue working on goals I set back in August/October of last year.

As I've previously blogged about, I decided to prioritize my mental, emotional and physical health. So, what does that mean? It meant recognizing the importance, setting goals, and most importantly taking action. I started seeing a therapist bi-weekly, working out at least 4-5 times a week, and being more accountable for the role I played in my life.

So far the progress I've made has been great! It can take a lot of work to get yourself to a place where you're ready to begin a journey, but once you're in the midst of your path, you look up and realize how much success you've already made.

This year I'm going to continue working out consistently, being sure to reevaluate my previous goals and make necessary tweaks that better reflect the progress I've made thus far. I'm also continuing my bi-weekly therapy appointments and doing the work necessary to be in an emotionally healthy place.

What else? This is so freaking random, but I finally reached my goal of getting all preventative dental work done! This may seem like a small thing to some, but I've been maxing out dental benefits for the past few years to get all cavities, root canals, and crowns taken care of. Last month marked the culmination of my journey when I got my wisdom teeth removed. I'm SO freaking excited to be done with preventative things and back on a routine of cleanings every 6 months.

Wishing everyone a healthy, happy and full 2015! Thank you for your continued support with my blog and friendship in real life.

Dec 30, 2014

Wisdom Teeth Update: Dry Socket + Stitches Removed [Video]

10 Days post wisdom teeth extraction and I finally got my stitches out! I also learned that what I thought had been merely a tight suture was actually dry socket. For the record: Dry Socket is extremely uncomfortable, but INSTANTLY feels better once the dentist applies a dressing to the tooth cavity.

Watch the video for my update and like always, feel free to ask any questions below!

Dec 29, 2014

Balayage results on Natural, African-American Hair

After rocking my Indique curly sew-in for quite some time, I was ready for a hair change. It had been a while since I last had my hair professionally colored and I was feeling very curious about the new balayage technique. One of my friends and co-workers had recently raved to me about her experience, but I wasn't sure how it'd look on natural, African-American hair. Doing a google search there wasn't a ton of info, so like always... I wanted to share my experience with everyone!

Why Balayage?
I absolutely LOVE color and was started to feel rather blah about my hair. In the past when I've had color it made my curls come alive and I seriously fell in love with my curls. A friend had raved about her experience getting balayage, but I didn't know how the results would look on my natural, African-American hair. In short, it was one of those styles I lusted after on Pinterest... white girls were slaying it lol... but I didn't know if I could pull it off. Looking online there weren't many examples of black chicks rocking balayage, so I thought it'd be a great opportunity to take the plunge and share my experience.

Risk of Color Damaging my Curls?
Color is a chemical process on the hair, so there is always a chance of your hair being damaged. The appeal of balayage was the idea that I wasn't getting allover color, but instead highlighting hairs here and there. On top of that, my stylist didn't use any bleach and I was also equipped with more patience, knowledge, and resources than I had in previous years when I had my hair professionally colored. Also - - I was feeling like life was entirely too short for me to be nervous over hair color! I was taking care of my body inside and out, so why not have fun with my hair. My motto for the week: Life is short. Get the color! Lol...

I arrived at the salon with my hair detangled in 2 flat twists. I wanted to make it easier for my stylist to work with my hair, so I'd also recommend prepping your hair prior to the appointment if you also have natural curls.

Once I was in the chair, my stylist (Izzy @ Vasuda Salon in Seattle) and I discussed the color I wanted, along with me showing her the inspiration pics I pulled. I also showed her examples of what I did NOT want. Often people bring in a slew of inspiration pics for their hair appointment, but I think there is a ton of value in making sure you also show your stylist clear examples of what you would NEVER want.

I received the balayage technique over my entire head and was pleasantly surprised at how quickly the process went. About 20-30 mins to apply the balayage and then another 30 mins to sit with the color and allow it to process.

Once the color was done processing we washed it all out and it was time to blow dry and flat iron my hair. I can easily create curly styles at home, so I tend to opt for straight styles when I'm at the salon. For some reason I've always struggled to recreate salon quality straight hair at home (sans the Brazilian Blowout), so I enjoy having a few days of salon straight hair.

My hair takes heat well, but getting the results to last an extended time isn't the easiest for me. I did a slightly bootleg job at wrapping my hair (without my trusty mesh wrap), so the results weren't as smooth. I took these pics the morning after in natural light to show a better look at how flawlessly my hair color blended. I wanted to keep my base color the same and naturally work the balayage highlights into my hair. I was smitten.

If you're on the fence about getting color, but itching for a change in 2015, I'd highly suggest going for balayage. You don't have to change your base color or deal with ugly roots growing out, which is a huge plus. On top of that you still get to play around with custom color and make your hair come alive.

For those in the Seattle area, please check out Vasuda Salon (I go to the Downtown Location) and ask for Izzy! She was absolutely amazing... such a talented stylist with the sweetest spirit and disposition. Tell them that I sent you

Dec 19, 2014

Wisdom Teeth Extractions - The first 24 hours

Yesterday marked the day I headed into the dentist and strolled out 90 mins later, 4 less teeth in my mouth. Although I genuinely felt one step closer to being a 1600s pirate (sans the scurvy as @Dovie_Golden so kindly pointed out to me lol), I was very excited to be getting rid of the teeth.

I've had my fair share of dental work done, so initially I was beyond excited about my appointment. The joy I felt at finally getting my wisdom yanked out far exceeded any doubts... that was until I started asking everyone under the sun their personal experience. Lord, I should've never opened up that Pandora's box. It was as if everyone had experienced some terrible thing - - dry socket in 1, dry socket in all 4, complications with removal, excruciating pain, etc... the list went on and on.

So, what was my experience like?

I arrived at my dentist's office at 9 and immediately went back to begin the process of getting numb. Once my dentist confirmed I was numb, the first 3 wisdom teeth (upper/lower left and upper right) came out within 7 mins. No joke. I didn't even have time to put on my headphones because he started the process so fast. The final tooth (lower right) was closer to the bone, so this one was going to take a bit more work. For some crazy reason this part of my mouth took forever to get numb. I had to get quite a few shots and wait at least 20 mins, but then we were good to go. Since the tooth was so close to the bone, my dentist ended up taking this out in 2 parts. I also had to receive suture on that tooth cavity, which is probably why I experienced more swelling on that side.


Leaving the dentist's office I headed straight to Walgreens and got my prescription filled for Vicodin and Ibuprofen. My dentist recommended managing my pain during the day with the Ibuprofen and using the Vicodin about an hour before bed. For some reason Vicodin does NOT make me sleepy, so I took it before bed but was still wide awake. I randomly work up around 3am THROBBING! Like, y'all... that ache was so serious. I instantly went for the Vicodin and within about 20 mins the pain was at bay and I was back asleep.

This morning I woke up and made breakfast so I could have some food in my system before taking more meds. Although pain meds don't necessarily make me sleepy, I am always subject to the dreaded sour stomach. I'm still eating soft foods, so I made some scrambled eggs and mashed potatoes. The icing on the cake? Another Vicodin lol...


Oh, the fun part... food! I'm restricted to soft food for the next few days. You'd imagine that I grubbed on a bunch of stuff pre-dental work, but I didn't. In hindsight I should have lol. Anyways, I've been eating pho broth, scrambled eggs, mashed potatoes, juice, popsicles... and I'm already over it lol. I'm not sitting over here starving, but I'm just ready to eat stuff with substance.

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